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| Player Status Page - who's injured, suspended or otherwise unavailable? |
| MATCH WEEK 33: EXPERIMENTALS TAKE TOTW |
Well despite fighting for their lives at the bottom of the Nightmare Premier League, The ExperiMentals move level with our big two for Team of the Week trophies as Cameron Patrick takes her fourth with 95 points. An inspired Captain Joker saw Moises Caicedo bring in 46 points with 23 doubled. 1 point for playing, 3 points for conceding three goals, 3 for Chelsea failing to score, 4 for a 5/10 performance rating and a big 12 for a Nightmare Gift. More on Cameron's fight for Premier League survival later.
Jonathan Andrews goes back top of the Overall League with a solid though uninspiring 57, with Matt Woodmansey scoring 44. |
| ROUND THE LEAGUES |
So Jonathan bounces straight back to top spot at Matt's expense. The big gap between 2nd and 3rd remains, with Colette Anthony equaling Matt's 44. Eloise Willingham returns to form and is up two to 4th, though at the price of a Captain Joker. At the bottom, Gary Pearson is clearly doomed. I'd have said the same about Colette and her ExperiMentals a couple of weeks back, but this week alone Colette took 65 points off the gap between the Mentals and the safety of 7th, with 105 points to make up.
Chris Bounds still leads the way in the Nightmare Championship with a 44 point cushion. Boundsy's captain Kyle Walker-Peters finally got the nod ahead of Wan-Bissaka for West Ham this week, and promptly knocked -8 off Looking Through A Glass O’Nien's score, but with other boys on form the Onions still had a half-decent week. For once they had a full 11 in play, and even a sub that played in O'Nien himself with -3. 2nd and 3rd swap places yet again, Paul Willingham up to 2nd and Liam Oliver 3rd. Reviewing positional changes (or lack of them) over the last 10 weeks or so, you'd think Chris is cruising to the title while Paul and Liam battle it out for 2nd. No such thing - from Liam in 3rd there is just a 12 point gap to 5th, and only 37 to 6th. Genuinely, Garry Simpson in 6th could yet easily win this League. At the foot, David Smith is just 5 from catching Frodo Willingham above the drop-line, gaining 23 this week.
Andrew White continues to lead Nightmare League One, but Patrick Reilly gained 28 this week and the gap is back down to 16.
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| UPCOMING MATCH WEEKS |
| OK so while certain other 'fantasy' competitions have a double Gameweek followed by a blank Gameweek on the horizon, that's not the case for Nightmare Soccer. There's really no need. It does mean, however, that here will be a super-quick turnaround between our Match Week 34 and Match Week 35... |
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Match Week 34 | Sat 18/04 - Mon 20/04 | Match Week 35 | Tue 21/04 - Mon 27/05 |
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| TOP TEAMS - this week | | Team | Manager | Points | | Swiffer | Andrew White | 0 | | Dishi Rishi | Barbara Willingham | 0 | | Grecians -2000 | Bob Thomas | 0 | | The Halibut flounderers | David Metzger | 0 | | Cudnt Hit A Cows Bum With A Banjo | Gary Pearson | 0 | | Blackheart Brewery FC | Garry Simpson | 0 | | Mr Magoo | Jonathan Andrews | 0 | | Relegation Terrorists | Paul Willingham | 0 | | The Muppets | Richard Hancy | 0 | | Only Connect | Tony Moore | 0 | | Al's Army | Alex Metzger | 0 | | West Park Untied | Oliver Willingham | 0 | | Clem Fandango | Matt Woodmansey | 0 | | Looking Through A Glass O’Nien | Chris Bounds | 0 | | Ipswich Invincibles | James Willingham | 0 | | Toffee Cottage | Patrick Reilly | 0 | | U Kante Beat Me | Luke Andrews | 0 | | The ExperiMentals | Cameron Patrick | 0 | | England neverbes | Marc Snell | 0 | | Another Fyne Mess | Keith Fyne | 0 | | Cat on Delap | Frodo Willingham | 0 | | ACW United | Alan Walker | 0 | | LOliver XI | Liam Oliver | 0 | | Z's Eleven | Rosalie Pearson | 0 | | Nightmare Novices | Colette Anthony | 0 | | Knackers | Robert Metzger | 0 | | Fulwood Albion | Steve Phillips | 0 |
| | | TOP NIGHTMARES - this week | | Player | Team | Points | | Michael Kayode | BRENTFORD | -3 | | Caoimhin Kelleher | BRENTFORD | -3 |
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| TOP NIGHTMARES | | Player | Team | Points | This | | Maxime Esteve | BURNLEY | 221 | | | Sander Berge | FULHAM | 204 | | | Kyle Walker | BURNLEY | 202 | | | Martin Dubravka | BURNLEY | 202 | | | Andre | WOLVES | 196 | | | Lesley Ugochukwu | BURNLEY | 193 | | | Josh Laurent | BURNLEY | 190 | | | Jorgen Strand Larsen | CRYSTAL P. | 187 | | | Joao Gomes | WOLVES | 182 | | | Florentino | BURNLEY | 181 | |
| | | WORST NIGHTMARES | | Player | Team | Points | This | | Walter Benitez | CRYSTAL P. | -7 | | | Tom Edozie | WOLVES | -2 | | | Callum Olusesi | TOTTENHAM | 0 | | | Sasa Kalajdzic | WOLVES | 0 | | | Jamaldeen Jimoh-Aloba | ASTON V. | 0 | |
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| TOP NIGHTMARES - BY RATING | | Player | Team | Ave. rating | | John Victor | NOTT'M FOREST | 5.40 | | Altay Bayindir | MAN UNITED | 5.50 | | Tyrique George | EVERTON | 5.50 | | Fer Lopez | WOLVES | 5.50 | | Conor Gallagher | TOTTENHAM | 5.67 | | Daniel James | LEEDS | 5.67 | | Romaine Mundle | .OUT FOR SEASON | 5.75 | | Hee Chan Hwang | WOLVES | 5.76 | | Leon Bailey | ASTON V. | 5.78 | | Taiwo Awoniyi | NOTT'M FOREST | 5.80 |
| | | WORST NIGHTMARES - BY RATING | | Player | Team | Ave. rating | | Bruno Fernandes | MAN UNITED | 7.52 | | Erling Haaland | MAN CITY | 7.45 | | Declan Rice | ARSENAL | 7.33 | | Jeremy Doku | MAN CITY | 7.28 | | Gabriel | ARSENAL | 7.20 | | Bukayo Saka | ARSENAL | 7.19 | | Phil Foden | MAN CITY | 7.14 | | Patrick Dorgu | MAN UNITED | 7.13 | | Rayan Cherki | MAN CITY | 7.11 | | James Garner | EVERTON | 7.09 | | Dominik Szoboszlai | LIVERPOOL | 7.07 | | Boubacar Kamara | ASTON V. | 7.06 | | Marc Guehi | MAN CITY | 7.03 | | Antoine Semenyo | MAN CITY | 7.03 | | Elliot Anderson | NOTT'M FOREST | 7.03 |
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Players must have played 23 minutes or more in at least three matches to appear in the Player Ratings charts. |